How Much Time Do You Need?
Easy conversation, sharing common interests, physical attraction, similar senses of humor, or intelligence…which one is most critical to the success of a first date? Check out what readers say is a necessity:
“The ability to converse comfortably sets the stage. Through conversation, you can follow the clues, what does this person laugh at? What are they interested in? What is important? How do they spend their time?” – Diane
“Making easy conversation is definitely most important. The other four are important, but I can’t imagine spending any time at all with a person if the conversation is forced. The other four aspects won’t matter if another person and I can’t speak easily to each other in the first place. How would those subjects even come up?” – Daniel
“Chemistry and compatibility are both needed for a successful relationship. If you have only compatibility, then you may have lots of common interests to talk about but there will be no romance and both sides would be treated as friends rather than in a relationship. If you have chemistry, first it’s the love at first sight scene, then it slowly becomes the “bored” syndrome where one or both regret their choice and no longer have feelings for the other.” – Ricky
Thanks readers! According to the survey by It’s Just Lunch (IJL), respondents say having easy conversation on a first date is most important for any success at 36 percent.
On a side note, how much time do you need before you decide you want to see the person again?
- 77 percent of respondents indicated that anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour suffices;
- 12 percent said five minutes will do;
- 7 percent said over and hour is adequate;
- 3 percent indicated that they always agree to go on a second date.
IJL is a worldwide matchmaking service with locations and services right here is Northern Virginia (Alexandria, Springfield and McLean).
E-mail me your videos, comments, and questions at littleredbook@northernvirginiamag.com.
-Katie
Tags: Dating, It's Just Lunch, Katie Greenan, Little Red Book, Northern Virginia, Northern Virginia Magazine, NoVA, nova mag, relationships
2 Responses
Daniel Says:
January 13th, 2012 at 5:14 pm
January 13th, 2012 at 5:14 pm
I agree with the 77 percent, I need about 20 minutes to an hour to decide whether or not I’d like to see someone again. I can’t believe that some people have the patience to always go on a second date! I might actually even need over an hour, I tend to be cautious about meeting and accepting new people into my life.
January 25th, 2012 at 3:42 pm
I personally think that all five components (common interests, easy conversation, physical attraction, similar sense of humor, and intelligence) are crucially important. I feel that if one of those five are at a lower level you can manage. However, if one of those five are missing completely then the relationship will most likely fail. If you can’t have a conversation with someone, how will you two communicate? If you don’t have similar interests, what will you two do together? If you don’t have physical attraction, how will you two enjoy intimate time together? If you don’t have a similar sense of humor, how will you laugh together? If the person you are dating is unintelligent and at a different level than you are, how will you talk about current events, technology, religion, life, etc. together? For me, personally, I can’t date someone who is a high school drop out or didn’t go to college, because I can’t relate my life to them right now. My life is school and I wouldn’t be able to understand what they’re experiencing with work or whatever else they may be doing. Another factor that isn’t listed on here that I think is extremely significant is age difference. I personally would not be able to date someone who is more than three or so years older than me. My mother is twelve years younger than my father, and they ended up getting a divorce. As time went on my mother couldn’t relate to my father anymore. My mom was still young and wanted to go out more, versus my father who wanted to stay in and major conflicts arose. Answering the how much time needed, I would need about 30 minutes to an hour to decided. If it’s there then it’s there, you’ll know.