By Carten Cordell
Few things in life require no explanation. Sears hairdryers have famously been labeled, “Don’t use while sleeping,” and paper coffee cups still read, “Caution. Contents may be hot.”
Yet while these pearls of wisdom seem self-evident and without need of elaboration, there are still a few bold souls that defy them.
These devil-make-cares tempt fate like a buffet table to a gang of Capitol Hill interns grasping for outlier status against nearly-certain sour outcome.
To their ranks add ‘Never take a selfie near a moving train.’ This one comes courtesy of Jared Michael, whose selfie attempt near railroad tracks quickly goes comically awry.
In the textbook sense, taking a selfie near any functioning railroad line appears to have an obvious element of danger attached to it , and yet the climax of this video is all the more shocking. Let’s just say the conductor of a certain passing train may have been on his way to an NFL combine.
Esquire magazine’s Ned Hepburn first brought to our attention young Jared, whose video grabbed more than 166,000 views seemingly faster than that boot connected with his head. But let us not judge the 21st century Rembrandt of self-portraiture too harshly, for with his Daedalus-like ambition he has managed to punt away our Wednesday doldrums.